As time goes on, the Teabaggers are gradually proving themselves to be both blatantly racist and the last true descendants of John Birch. (I mean, come on! This is the public face of the Tea Party - what is it that they aren't willing to say in public?) But what midgets are hiding behind the massive sacks of crap in the front?
Well, for that, we should probably turn to that unfettered fount of fecal matter, Sarah Palin. So what lesser-known candidates does she like?
Sean Bielat for Massachusetts’ 4th Congressional District
It's hard to tell much about Bielat. He stays pretty well under the radar. He has been smart enough to release a viral video about Barney Frank, but that's about it.
Of course, Barney Frank is every Republican's worst nightmare. He's an effective, sarcastic, openly-gay Democrat - he gives them nightmares. They'd pretty much back Satan Himself against Frank, if they thought He had a chance of winning. ("Of course He's a good church-going person! Just ask his minister, the Reverend LeVey!")
(Are you supposed to capitalize the pronouns referring to Satan? I'm not even clear where you'd go to look that up, but I suspect you don't...)
Butch Otter for Governor of Idaho
Wow. So the man's first elected position was two terms with the Idaho House of Representatives. Then he was on the Idaho Republican Party Central Committee and Chairman of the Canyon County Republican Party. He served four terms as Lieutenant Governor, three terms in Congress, and he's been governor of Idaho since 2007. I thought the Tea Party was opposed to career politicians?
You know, as a convicted drunk driver himself, he's awfully hard on aides who get caught for the same offense. But it's obvious why Sarah likes him: he gets off on killing wolves too.
Stephen Fincher for Tennessee’s 8th Congressional District
An interesting choice for Ms. Palin. He takes potentially illegal campaign loans, but considering Palin's history with campaign funds (and, you know, $150,000 wardrobes that are still unaccounted for), that one would be easy for her to overlook. Fincher has refused to comment. On any issue.
But then, Sarah supports that idea, too. Because it was when she actually spoke to people that she got in trouble. Better to avoid speaking entirely...
Randy Hultgren for Illinois’ 14th Congressional District
Randy is another cipher. He talks a great game, but...
See, here's the thing. He's running against Bill Foster. An acknowledged science wonk, known for being a true centrist, more interested in the people and the result than in sheer partisan bickering. To most people, you'd think this would be a good thing. But to Sarah Palin, he's the Black Hole of Evil.
A true centrist is the last thing she wants. Someone who pays attention to the realities of a situation, and not the political implications? She can't have that! We must have strict partisan divides!
This is pretty much what Sarah does. She supports ciphers who've said they support any kind of stupid right-wing crap, as long as it gets them elected. But Sarah doesn't always go with that "due diligence" thing. You know, like in an earlier list, where Sarah plugged a "great" West Virginian candidate, John Raese.
She supported Raese for a while now (you know, despite the fact that even his wife won't be voting for him), although... well, OK, she was giving her support to him for a race where he wasn't running. She thought he was from Pennsylvania, as it shows in this Twitter post that she has since scrubbed from her website.
But it's an understandable mistake. After all, for Raese's West Virginia political ad, he went to Philadelphia, and put out a casting call for "coal miner/trucker" types with "a ‘Hicky’ Blue Collar look."(Apparently, those types of people are thin on the ground in West Virginia.)
The only people in the Tea Party are mad hatters.
ReplyDeleteDB
I have never voted a straight ticket in my life. I was brought up to vote for the man/woman -- not the party. In the coming midterm elections, I will break that tradition. I refuse to give my vote to ANY Republican because they enable the lunatics by their silence.
ReplyDeleteKay, my sentiments exactly! I am registered as an independent because I never wanted either party to take a party affiliation for granted; however, this year, I intend to vote a straight Democratic ticket for precisely the same reasons. I just cannot reward the Republicans with a single vote for fielding the junkiest candidates in memory.
ReplyDeleteNC, your first paragraph is marvelous; it made me laugh out loud. Of course, after I've laughed it always hits me that the Tea Party is real, not some witty bit from SNL. Still, I appreciate your talent for pointing out the absurdity of these small minded, power hungry aspirers to greatness. I do so hope that the majority of people will come to realize that all these legends in their own minds are akin to the Emperor from the fairy tale and have no clothes on.
ReplyDeleteNameless Cynic, about these candidates you mentioned, many of them seem to have this in common: The Bizarre Ideology Behind Tea Partiers' Plans to Kill Social Security and Child Labor Laws. The Republicans should more carefully vet their candidates ... "vet" in the sense of "to examine more carefully," not in the sense of caring for animals.
ReplyDeleteOcto,
ReplyDeleteSounds from the description of "tentherism" as if some people just can't read -- the trait you and the article referenced identify amounts to a literalism so thorough that it beggars description.
Literate people understand (either intuitively or by training) that all "reading" involves some measure of interpretation -- interpretation that is not reducible to any neat concept like "the Founders' intentions" or "the plain meaning of the text."
A reading that remains insistently literal is bound to be a stupid reading, one that will miss a large part of the text's significance. This is an ancient principle -- the Church Fathers, for instance, insisted that readers attend to the "literal" level of the Bible, but they also insisted that interpretation should proceed to other, more spiritual and broader, levels of significance. Lit crit follows suit, of course.
So what have here is bad readers -- for them, the narrowest, most simplistic reading is the only one possible, and if we go beyond it, chaos and depravity are sure to follow.
Dino, I wasn't sure how html formatting would handle "tentherism" followed by a colon, so left out the word. But you're right. Tentherism it is.
ReplyDeleteAnd you're right: It beggars description ... the whole damn movement!
Hoping for a miracle next Tuesday (but that would be magical thinking).
As for satanic candidates, this person sounds like he qualifies:
ReplyDeleteTea Party backing candidate who allegedly shot unarmed Iraqis 60 times