It seems that our friends in the media are now considering Governor Goodhair to be a viable candidate for President. Well, sure. He might be some mutant version of a "serious statesman." Why the fuck not? Hell, if Michelle "Batshit Crazy" Bachmann is a viable candidate, why not Rick Perry, right?
And, really, while I know that the media is too scared of accusations of "liberal bias" to get tough with the man, I have some questions that I'd like to hear somebody ask. Like the following:
Now, Governor, you keep hinting that Texas should secede. You never quite say "the s-word," but you come so close, because you know the crazy people love that shit.
Now, if you think that Texas should split off from America, but then you say you want to be the President of that same United States... how do you balance those two thoughts?
In fact, if you think about it, Governor, despite your rhetoric that Obama was taking us over the edge, we're still here. Haven't gone over any edge. And not likely to, either. But you felt that the American people would allow themselves, to be taken in (hell, already had been) by a demagogue. Why do you think that everybody who doesn't believe just like you do is stupid and easily-led? Why don't you believe in America, Ricky?
Of course, right after saying that government was too big and spent too much money and Texas should (consider that maybe they might, if they wanted to) secede, you told Obama that you wanted half a million dollars worth of Tamiflu, and later told Obama he wasn't sending enough troops to secure the border... a border that you would have to secure for yourself...
I'm sorry, Governor. I was having a hard time wrapping my head around that. Anyway, I hope that by this time you're aware that the whole "Texas can secede!" thing is a steaming pile of lies, right? And that the other politicians in Texas are laughing at you over this, right?
First of all, Governor, I'd just like to say that your hair looks spectacular. Of course, it always does, doesn't it? Now, there's a rumor that's been following you for several years now, that you might be gay. Although I don't believe that there's anything more than a passing resemblance between you and one of the Village People, I was wondering if you'd care to comment on that?
Recently, your college transcript was leaked to the press, and it turns out that at Texas A&M, you could barely pull a C average: couple of F's, a lot of D's, and only two A's, one of them in something called Improv. of Learning - what exactly is that, Governor? Is that a remedial course or something? Never mind; it doesn't matter. But anyway, Governor, Texas Agricultural & Mechanical University is not an Ivy League institution (seriously, somebody should look up what Texans mean when they call somebody an "Aggie"); so, if it's true that your time there "helped shape who (you are) today," and you spent that time trying to flunk out of school, who exactly does that make you?
On that subject, a Bachelor's Degree is also called a "four-year degree" - you took five years at Texas Pigs & Tractors, from 1968 to 1972, to earn your Animal Science degree. Does your leadership as governor for the last decade have anything to do with Texas now leading the nation in percentage of adults without a high school diploma?
You've been pushing the power of prayer a lot; you seem to feel that people should talk to God. On April 21, you called on the citizens of Texas to pray for rain. At that point, about 15% of Texas was experiencing what's called "exceptional" drought conditions. By August 9th, that had increased to almost 80%. What was God telling you then, Rick?
You seem very proud of Texas. You seem to think you've done great things for the state, as it's longest-running governor. And you have. Texas leads the rest of the nation in a number of areas. It has the fourth highest poverty rate; last year, it tied with Mississippi for the largest percentage of workers in minimum-wage jobs; you lead the country in percentage of workers without health insurance, and kids without health insurance (and since Texas is less healthy than 80% of the country, think about what that means).
Face facts, Perry. In the same way Bush wrecked the country during his tenure as President, he ass-raped Texas during his time as governor. The difference is, in Texas, his successor only made things worse.
Perry is a degenerate reprobate and a very dangerous kook. And yes he is a kook. There have been several studies associating hyper-religiosity to a mental illness.
ReplyDeleteBut all this flack about his grades and taking five years to get his bachelor's degree just seems a bit trivial, pointless, and even has the smell of intellectual snobbishness - something I personally abhor. I've known a lot of PhDs in my life who couldn't find their way out of a paper bag.
It took me ten years to get my BA and my grades weren't a hell of a lot better. In fact, I have hidden my transcripts from my children and any other prying eyes. I make no claims to being a genius or a scholar, but I ain't exactly stupid either.
On the other hand, Perry is indeed stupid, but I've always felt that equating brains with intelligence is a huge mistake.
I suspect we will be using this a lot this year:
ReplyDeleteRead my lips; no new Texans!
Leslie,
You kidding! You are an absolute genius ... and sorely missed around here. Your Steinbeck retrospective is a masterpiece and an Internet classic.
Awww, thank you Octo. Have been getting a lot of "love notes" lately from folks who don't agree with you. Have had to finally resort to moderation. : (
ReplyDeleteBachmann is such a ding-dong I don't think most people take her seriously but Perry is flat-out DANGEROUS. Beware.
Nameless,
ReplyDeleteWell, this all looks like part of the historical process to this dinosaur. First Nixon was rehabbed, and we've now got to the point at which even Democrats seem to remember President Reagan through a rose-red haze. I suppose if we get "President Perry," we'll be rec'lecting fondly what a fine statesman Bush 43 was. One can only wonder, what sort of fearless leader would make us see Perry that way in, say, 2034? Better not to think about that too much, I guess -- I haven't had my lunch yet.
By the way Leslie,
ReplyDeleteOne really sees the full people-spectrum in academe -- ruthless careerists, noble idealists, savvy, wordly thinkers, plodding workhorses, and the occasional "How the hell DID that person ever get a degree?" type. One thing I've long found amusing is that just as with pols there's a tendency to inflate accomplishments ("I took a college course; therefore, I have a doctorate," etc.), with scholars there's a collective pretension to something bordering on total knowledge. Somebody knows the Greek alphabet, and everybody else says "Professor X knows Greek." Or "she's a Shakespeare specialist; therefore, she must have read everything ever written about Shakespeare." To which this snickering highly degreed but simple-minded reptile says, "You gotta be kidding me!" It would take a thousand years to do that, and much of it would be timebound drivel or fashionable nonsense anyhow -- stuff that would only keep you from thinking things through on your own.
One of my favorite fellow students many years ago was a chap who was quite brilliant but who was sort of a perpetual loser when it came to school -- he never got much by way of grades and eventually faded out of college, but he was always insightful in his readings and observations. Many a dull plodder went on to get a degree, but this guy already had what they probably never will: a genuine education and not just "herd consciousness." Of course, he's probably delivering pizzas or something like that nowadays, I don't know. The world doesn't much appreciate wisdom or insight, most of the time. When it does, I think it's usually just a happy accident.
"The world doesn't much appreciate wisdom or insight, most of the time. When it does, I think it's usually just a happy accident."
ReplyDeleteSadly true. Also, I think a lot of plodders are good at regurgitation/memorizing but have no ability to analyze and reason.
Leslie, I'm continually delighted as to how often we're on the same wavelength.
ReplyDeleteNameless, I am not offering the following as a chastisement and hope that it will be accepted as an attempt at consciousness raising.
I was struck by the following statement in your post, Now, there's a rumor that's been following you for several years now, that you might be gay. Although I don't believe that there's anything more than a passing resemblance between you and one of the Village People, I was wondering if you'd care to comment on that?
As much as I am not in favor of Rick Perry's politics, his sexual orientation is insignificant. Yes, I know that your focus was on Perry's character or lack thereof, but the inclusion of such an assertion is tantamount to equating being gay as some negative quality for which one should be ashamed or at the least have to explain. If Perry were gay, it should make absolutely no difference in his acceptability as a candidate. That it would, is more disturbing in many ways than Perry's candidacy.
Prejudice based on sexual orientation is encouraged by such seemingly offhand commentary. We live in a country where a young man can be beaten and crucified on a fence because of his sexual orientation; where 11-year-olds commit suicide because they are taunted because they are perceived as gay; where the majority of the states still deny gay couples the same civil rights enjoyed by straight couples.
I don't think that those of us who know better can be too diligent in not slipping into promotion of sexual orientation as fodder for potential denigration of anyone, even Rick Perry. Any commentary that we make, however unintentionally, that presents homosexuality as a repugnant quality to be rejected and being gay as a secret to be kept hidden serves to advance homophobia.
Sheria,
ReplyDeleteNow that you mention it, I think the "gay" meme gets used on practically every male celebrity and lots of politicians. Can't tell you how many times I've brought up some actor's name and the person I'm talking to blurts out, "Oh, he's GAY, didn't you know that?" as if it were an absolute certainty and I was a big stupid dinosaur for not knowing it. Uh, well, no I didn't and I'm not sure I do now, either. No evidence is ever offered for the "charge," so-called. It's just an "everybody knows" kind of thing, apparently. Only, everybody doesn't know; they just think they do. Oh well, I think it's almost a rite of passage for famous guys. Years ago, whenever I would teach one of Oscar Wilde's works, some student would pipe up sheepishly, "wasn't he gay?" Given The Oscar's biographical particulars, I was always tempted to respond, "Nooooooooo! -- really???" I don't hear that as much nowadays, though.
It's true. Many of the charges are entirely unfair. A lot of people take 5 years to get a Bachelor's (and, y'know, Leslie, it's hard to call it "elitist" when I don't have a degree, either - thanks, CCAF), and as far as I can tell, the "gay" meme was created by the Kay Bailey Hutchinson campaign some years back. Aside from highlighting the strange little inconsistencies in the man's background, a few of those questions were just hypotheticals, as if the press would ever treat a Republican the way they treat Democrats. They're deferential to people like Perry and Bachmann, without ever challenging the paranoid psychosis that spews from their cakeholes.
ReplyDeleteYour observations are dead on Dino. My concern is that the observations about sexual orientation are used in a pejorative fashion. Declaring someone gay isn't the same as saying he's married, or isn't he divorced, it's an attempt to suggest something negative about that person's character. In general parlance, most don't observe that someone is gay to be complimentary.
ReplyDeleteLet me hasten to add that I did not perceive that Nameless was trying to promote such a point of view. My observations were based on my belief that sometimes we inadvertently promote beliefs which in reality we do not support when we don't carefully examine our use of cultural references.
Nameless, I really did appreciate your overall point of view and you made me laugh at Perry's foibles.
Ya but -- when someone like Perry boosts his career by making the lives of gay people as miserable as possible, I think he places his orientation in the same category as his stupid hat and stupid boots and his many other stupid ideas and all the other stupid things about him.
ReplyDelete