Thursday, May 8, 2014

How Dwarf Clairvoyants Unleashed the Zombie Apocalypse

In December 2008, weeks before our newly elected president took the oath of office, Rush Limbaugh said, ”I hope he fails.” These words gave the GOP their master plan to nullify a landslide election and kill off what little remained of democracy in America.  Destroy a newly elected president by saying ‘NO’ to everything.  Demonize him with ‘Birtherism” and color him the illegitimate Manchurian candidate from Kenya.  Portray him as unaccomplished in life with nothing to say and nothing to contribute.  Start with this predetermination: You denounce every thought, word and deed - past, present and future - as utterly worthless and devoid of merit.  If you defame and discredit the president-elect in advance before his presidency even begins, then only one of two hypotheses must be true:


One:  You have secret access to his mind, know all there is to know, possess full foreknowledge of all possible future outcomes, and have a crystal ball that portends the destruction of a once great and powerful nation, the nadir of civilization, and the dreaded End Time.  You report your findings to the Guardians of Party Piety and Purity.

OR …

Two.  You just can’t get beyond the fact that president #44 is biracial.  Some will show open contempt by forwarding emails of racist cartoons.  Others will disguise their contempt under coded messages of snicker-n-wink: “He’s the President of Moochers and Takers,” mock the Makers and Job Creators with derision and scorn.  You will be fixated day and night on ways to block his legislative agenda for any reason you can muster with bluster and filibuster, or find ways to impeach him outright.  The Libtard-Socialist anti-Christ must be stopped, says every freedom-loving, God-fearing Christian whack-job fixated on Hellfire and Perdition.

Either way, you unleash the Eumenides of legislative gridlock and deadlock to make sure he fails (and thereby punish the 69 million voters who voted for him, plus the 60 million voters who didn’t). Collateral damage notwithstanding, all libtards and their ilk must be taught a lesson and turned from the Dark Side of the Farce, they vow with reckless abandon.

In due course, corporations morph into people, and money becomes the currency of free speech. You slash funds for education; aid and abet joblessness by declaring war on reproductive rights; let our national infrastructure crumble; allow polluters to poison our air and water; and shut down the government. In due course, all GOP Congress critters anoint themselves as authoritative experts in science - claiming to be even smarter than the best scientific minds in the known Universe.

Will we ever find respite from the Dwarf Clairvoyant Escapees of the insane asylum who unleashed this madness?  Hardly!  The small-minded mediums are still at large.





10 comments:

  1. We live at a time when nearly all of what defines it: technology and science, psychology and economics is far beyond the ability of poorly educated, poorly motivated, steeped in superstition and no brighter than anyone else Americans to understand and what can we turn to but taunts and Schadenfreude? Well more than half of us think the annoyingly named 'big bang' never occurred. A huge proportion seriously think the Genesis story is true and haven't the mental substance to see how idiotic that is. What can they do but what any bully does to hide his weakness?

    Albert Einstein was a "libtard" but Sarah Palin is a heroine to half of us, so what can I say and what can I believe but that we are seeing a crusade -- and as crusades always have been, it's fomented, formulated, focused and led to suicidal objectives by cynical men who hope to profit in safety and isolation.

    Small minded mediums, larges and XXl's indeed. They not only want Obama to fail and the economy to fail, they want Liberal, constitutional democracy to fail. They want freedom itself to fail.

    George Bush was characterized as someone who wanted to overturn the social advances and civil rights improvements of the 1960's, but this crusade is, I think, far more ambitious. When "conservative" leaders can express a lack of interest when someone is tortured with a cattle prod while he writhes in agony, When it's easy to strangle any popular movement and create a popular movement with propaganda - when it becomes legal to substitute religious law for civil law and give special privileges to certain religious groups - becomes easy to arrest science and poison the land and water in the interests of a very, very few, I think it's wrong and foolish and too damned late to hope.

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  2. Which is to say dare not espouse disgreement with his policys, political or social philosophy, or question his performance lest Ye be labeled a wacko or small minded.

    President Obama has done an adequate job in office and he was reelected because the alternative would likely have not been better.

    Limbaugh and the rest of the rightwing media talking heads are entertainers and they entertain the sheeple who either won't or can't think for themselves.

    Limbaugh et all aside there are principled conservatives and libertarians that do not share their views. Unfortunately the reasonable opposition in the the republican to Obama's policies and politics are outnumbered and the party power structure controls the party agenda, just as it is with the democratic party.
    Party politics demands loyalty to party above all else. Unfortunate at best and
    destructive at its worst.

    Obama has not deserved all the criticism and obstruction he has encountered, and there is a certain element that opposes him because he is biracial. However, having said that, the many who honestly disagree with his policies deserve to be heard.

    Honestly, it is becoming evident with each passing month that the super highway of information communication, the internet, has its definite downsides.

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    1. People have an amazing ability to use breakthrough technology for the strangest purposes. Soon after the VCR debuted, pornography became it's number one use - same thing with the internet and the web apparently, but the "information superhighway" is jammed with truckloads of bullshit for sure. History's biggest gift to propagandists. Yes, it gave a voice to the common man, but it's a mixed blessing.

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    2. However, having said that, the many who honestly disagree with his policies deserve to be heard.”

      Confirmed. There are many liberals who have not always agreed with the president either, this writer included. For example, I would have preferred a more comprehensive single-payer healthcare initiative, in contrast to the one we got. Having lived in London in the 1980s and Paris in the 1990s, I have firsthand experience with the national healthcare plans of Europe – often dismissed as socialized medicine by Americans who know so much that they end up knowing so little. European nations offer better healthcare at a far more affordable price. The AHCA was an exercise in political sausage grinding, and America still lags behind the rest of the civilized world.

      Among liberals and libertarians, I believe there has been a convergence of opinion on matters of military intervention, illicit drug enforcement policy, and inequities in our criminal justice system. Rand Paul, for instance, has been constructive in his criticism of a national drug policy proven to be an exercise in futility, and a criminal justice system that incarcerates far more minorities than whites over the same offenses. On the use of American military power, the president has been more reserved than either of his election opponents would have been - and certainly more than his predecessor.

      Among liberals and libertarians, there is room for agreement on other issues, including a more sensible approach to gun control, and election finance reform to minimize influence peddling that undermines the integrity of our democratic institutions.

      On other issues, who knows? We’ll just have to wait and see. On one issue we can all agree: Zombie Apocalypse extremists have poisoned the atmosphere.

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    3. Read, agreed, and affirmed.

      We often let the "how we get there" differences cloud our nation conscientiousness. How we get there at the end of the day is likely less important than getting there. Getting there requires compromise, if the nation becomes so polarized, and it is well on its way, that it can no longer do that politically we WILL become a second and maybe third world country.

      Will I don't like statism the old saying "United together we stand, divided we fall" is certainly apropos.

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    4. The big problem for anyone who "honestly" disagrees with a policy or action of the President is they are surrounded by such a cloud racism and rabid ignorance that there is no room let in the poisonous cloud of bullshit to allow for a reasoned debate. We tried that in the beginning, during the President's first term and there was absolutely no attempt on the right to hide their vicious disappointment at being usurped by a Negro. And then the country just slid downhill from there.

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  3. "Honestly, it is becoming evident with each passing month that the super highway of information communication, the internet, has its definite downsides."

    Sorta reminds me of a lifetime listening to too much rock-n-roll. Eventually, you'll need a hearing aid ("tap, tap, there's a buzz in my ear").

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  4. Thankfully there is classical, blues, big band, folk, Latin, reggae, and jazz as well.

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  5. The government actually has a secret plan to Combat a Zombie Apocalypse, which includes, among other civil defense strategies, a Chaplin Corps (for religious counseling of zombies), remote controlled robots (a surveillance weapon of non-edible flesh), and hand sanitizers.

    More recently, the CDC released this report on
    Zombie Preparedness, which states:

    If you are generally well equipped to deal with a zombie apocalypse you will be prepared for a hurricane, pandemic, earthquake, or terrorist attack.

    Makes perfect sense to me. Hey Republicans! You’re toast!

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