Wednesday, June 24, 2009

CLOWNFISH OF THE WEEK: GOVERNOR MARK SANFORD


Photoshop credit: AZrainman

He disappeared from plain sight. When asked of his whereabouts, his cohorts refused to answer. Security, they said. His wife knew nothing. Reporters spotted his car at the airport. Rumors swirled. Something about taking a hike in the Appalachians. Finally, an admission, a clandestine trip … Yeee Haah … to Argentina!
Can’t you hear me, baby, rappin’ on your door?
Can’t you hear me, baby, rappin’ on your door?
Now you hear me tappin’, tappin’ across your floor.
For seven days and seven nights days, Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina was missing. This is the same Governor Mark Sanford who refused to accept federal economic stimulus funds ... for the State of South Carolina that has among the worst unemployment stats in the nation … and failing grades in education.
Feel like a broke-down engine, ain’t got no drive at all,
Feel like a broke-down engine, ain’t got no drive at all.
This is the same Governor Sanford whose own legislature voted to accept the stimulus money and override his veto, whose own State Supreme Court upheld the state legislature that demanded the governor take the stimulus money; the same Governor Sanford from the same great state of South Carolina, rumors say, who wants to run for president of these even greater United States of Aye!
Lordy, Lord, Lordy, Lord, Lordy, Lord.
After seven days and seven nights, we discover Governor Mark Sanford had secretly flown to Argentina to visit a woman with whom he had been having … an affair! "I've let down a lot of people," said the governor at a news conference where he choked up as he ruminated on God's law, moral absolutes and following one's heart. His family did not attend.
Feel like a broke-down engine,
ain’t got no whistle or bell,
If you’re a real hot momma,
drive away Daddy’s weeping spell.
At The Swash Zone today, the temperature is 87 degrees and sunny. Visibility is 10 miles, and the surf is calm. All resident clownfish have left our shores … bound for South Carolina.

13 comments:

  1. goodness, goodness, goodness . . .

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  2. Just between us dudes Octo, I'd sure like to see this lady that's worth three trips to Argentina and two timing your wife for.

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  3. The Republican Party should just open a whore house for its members. They will have to get a few man whores for guys like Craig.

    Republicans deserve to be hammered on these sexual revelations. After all, they spent decades telling America that their family values and morals are superior to Democrats.

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  4. Octo.....Good post. You do realize that if you don't stop posting things that I agree with, I am totally going to lose this reputation of mine! He is a winner for sure. At least he isn't from Jersey, we tend to make some pretty out there representatives. :-)

    Truth....That is just soooooo wrong! :-)

    Time.....
    Ya just gotta love those that say one thing and do another, but that is certainly not limited to Republicans. I tend to dislike hypocrites no matter what side of the political spectrum they are on. ANYONE that takes an oath of marriage and then defiles it, should be taken to task.

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  5. The real irony here is that, if this dick hadn't spent the last three months posturing like a peacock over the stimulus, hardly anybody outside of South Carolina would have a clue who he is, and he might very well have gotten away with his sordid little affair.

    Blowback is a cruel thing.

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  6. I don't care one wit about Sanford's infidelity. His faux-piety is annoying and the fact that he just disappeared for days seems grossly irresponsible, but what really bothers me is that this story is going to get nonstop coverage in the MSM for daaaaaays. Healthcare is on the table, Iran is falling apart, North Korea is threatening to shoot missiles at us - but wait a second! Put all of that on hold! Gov. Sanford had sex with the wrong person.

    Oh well.

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  7. I'm with you, Brian - we certainly have bigger fish to fry.

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  8. If only we could actually fry them!

    Still, it's fun to watch this engineer hoist by his own petard, or whatever he calls it.

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  9. Octo: This is what, the 2nd one in just as many weeks? From what I understand, this relationship went on for years, but only escalated to affair status recently. Well, one knows when a friendship is escalating into something more. Sanford could've stopped it before it got to romance status or he could've filed for a divorce or he could've resigned as Governor in advance. He chose none of the above. Jennifer is right about hypocrites and all cheaters being brought to task. And I’m with Rocky and Brian that this needs to go away and we need to concentrate on the important issues that are plaguing our country.

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  10. Yes, Pamela, Octopus is guilty of more tabloid journalism ... but this was such an easy "mark" (tisk).

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  11. I know it was wrong Jennifer. But it just felt so right. I mean correct. No offense intended to the right. At least not this time.

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  12. T101, suffice to say, this Lolita is no Evita, and 8pus shall say no more.

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  13. An ex-blogger called me today and offered what I have been overlooking. There real reason for the rampant marital collapses of so many politicians has been warned against repeatedly by the religious right.

    It was gay marriage that drove him to it! As long as we allow the same sex to marry, the more "regular" marriages will fail.

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