By Octopus
I have often wondered where John F. Kennedy cribbed the phrase, “ask not what your country can do for you - ask what you can do for your country.”
Researching the Internet yesterday for a clue, I finally located a source: Huitzilopochtli (plus a curious codicil from House Republicans, Eric Cantor and Ron Paul).
If you want to serve your country and heed the call of Cantor and Paul - which means pull the plug on FEMA, emancipate seniors from Social Security slavery, cast out MediScare, and gut food safety regulations - please note: Human sacrifice is pleasing to Huitzilopochtli.
No money for disaster relief? No problem! Let hurricanes drown all deadbeats on the Federal dole. Distribute emergency food to the hungry? Let them eat brioche! Only 28,000 hospitalizations and 3,000 deaths from tainted food each year? Save money with salmonella!
With fewer folks making demands on the gubbermint, more supplies will surely trickle down to the rest of us. After all, human sacrifice is pleasing to Huitzilopochtli.
How many sacrificial human beings will it take to balance the budget? To reach a savings of $2.7 trillion, a mere 100 sacrificial billionaires will suffice - compared to 163,279,483 middle-class Amerikaners. But everyone knows billionaires have no hearts worthy of sacrifice, which is not pleasing to Huitzilopochtli.
Huitzilopochtli will be counting on us to do our civic duty. So ask not what House Republicans can do for you - ask what you can do for House Republicans.
